A new journey

    I've known my entire life that I am adopted.  I can't remember ever not knowing.  My parents talked to me about it often, and I had no doubt that I was loved beyond measure by my parents.  My mom wasn't able to have children, and she struggled for years before she and my dad decided to adopt.  She often told me stories about praying for me before I was even born and about how blessed she and my dad felt that God had given me to them.

     When Brad and I got married, we knew we wanted 2 kids.  Two kids, and that would be it.  I'm not really sure why we decided that, but we'd always been on the same page about it...until last summer.  Something started to stir in my heart.  All of a sudden I felt this gentle nudge telling me that we were to have a 3rd child.  Needless to say, Brad had not had that nudge yet...so nothing much happened.  We talked about it a lot, but he just wasn't there.

    And somewhere in the middle of all of it, I got a second nudge that our 3rd child should come through adoption.  I'm not sure why.  Even though I'm adopted, I'd never really thought much about adopting.  I know that might sound weird but I hadn't.  I'd seen several friends adopt, and it was such a blessing to watch but I just never felt that calling.  Well, until last summer.

    Well, months went by and nothing really happened.  Brad slowly began to warm up to the idea of a 3rd child after a lot of prayer and very wise counsel (no- i wasn't the wise counsel:).  And in early February we found out I was pregnant.  But there was little time to get excited, because I was told almost immediately that I would miscarry.  After a long and confusing month, I found out that I actually had an ectopic pregnancy.  It was incredibly heartbreaking and a long hard 4 months followed.

    When everything was over with the pregnancy, I was so confused.  I couldn't figure out what God was trying to tell me.  Did he want us to have another baby?  Were we listening to Him? Were we truly seeking His will?  And that's when I received an email about adopting a "Waiting Child" from China.  (These waiting children are older children that have special needs.)  All of a sudden, I heard a voice say, "This is it.  This is what I have been preparing you for."  I brought it up to Brad not knowing what his response would be and he said, "Yeah.  I'm really interested in that.  What are the next steps?"

    I just about fell out of my chair.  I knew immediately that this was what God wanted us to do.  For a year, Brad and I had struggled to figure out what God wanted for our family and we just couldn't seem to get on the same page.  And all of a sudden, we were on exactly the same page!

    Of course, we were both still terrified....and it took a few more months of praying, seeking advice from friends who've adopted and more prayer...but I'm excited to say....

    We are officially adopting an older special needs child from China.  We are still very early in the process and about to start our home study.  We have requested a child that is 0-3...boy or girl.  The whole process will probably take about a year.

    We are excited. We are nervous. But we have no doubt that God is in complete control of this adoption.  It is expensive.  To be honest, that part still scares me.  But I'm praying for a peace that passes all understanding and that I can truly let go of it all and give it to the only one who can truly provide for all of our needs.

    So, a new journey has begun for our family.  Emma and Liam are so excited they can hardly stand it.  And we can't wait to meet this child that God has picked for our family.  We know that there are going to peaks and valleys through this process.  We know it won't always be easy, but we also know that we have a loving God who will never leave us or forsake us.

   I plan on trying to keep everyone updated through our blog.  So, please keep coming back and reading.  And thank you for walking alongside us as we start this journey.